You Were The One
by Dean's Little Secret
Summary: We were in love once, we were something amazing and beautiful but now there is nothing left and even though it kills me… I have to say goodbye. Written in Keira’s POV. Set after Jak X: SongFic


**You _Were_ The One**

**Of all the things I've believed in  
I just want to get it over with  
Tears form behind my eyes  
But I do not cry  
Counting the days that pass me by**

I love you… _or I did_… or I do… it's hard to tell now. I don't know you anymore and yet I still do. I can't explain it, you are still the same sweet person I once knew and yet… yet at the same time you are some… monster. I never wanted to say that, never wanted to believe it… but you're slipping into the dark, losing control, becoming that 'thing' that is inside you. I know its not you and the funny thing is you know it too, but for some reason you are letting it take over or maybe you are morphing into it. God damnit I just don't know anymore, I don't know you and I don't know why I love you… if I still love you.

Some days you are almost… _almost_ like the old Jak. You smile, you laugh, you hold my hand and take me into your arms. I love you then. I never want you to let me go, I want the world to just stop spinning for one second so I can savour the moment just a little longer. But like you the moment is gone but not forgotten. I treasure these moments so close to my heart but then… then on the days where you are not you I forget them, I just remember how we yell and scream at each other and in the end there is only tears and despair.

You storm off and I try, I _try_ so hard not to cry but I break down. The tears fall, my walls rise and I am left lonely and broken and you… you are gone. I hate you then, I hate what you are. All my love for you is burned by my rage and I fall to the floor, I'm crashing, I'm falling but you're falling faster and harder.

I swear, I swear to the Precursor's that when we hit the bottom, when every word is said, when ever tear is shed, the world will hear us fall, hear us break. They might just hear us… see us die.

I love you, I did love you, I'm so confused but this is why I a have to say… this is why I have to say goodbye. I am leaving, I am crying, I am dying on the inside. I have to do this though. I still think I love you… it hurts to know we fight, to know we will never be something more. All my love, all my wishes, all my _hopes and prayers_ have fallen on deaf ears. We were… something once; we _could_ have been something… _something_ great.

Now there's almost nothing left of us… I wish there was nothing, _nothing _left at all but what is left hurts. What this mess… this beautiful disaster has left is pain, despair and a river of tears.

I once thought, foolish of me I know, that all this would just go away… _vanish_, like the clouds in the sky. It never vanished, never faded, it, _we_, just got worse. Our love turned to hate, our past is now forgotten, those… _those_ happy, serene memories are just that… _memories_. Broken, tainted and faded. Just like us, like the love we once had, like the love we could have had. There really is nothing left and… my last hope died today.

You came to see me, no smile, no laughs; you didn't take my hand and pull me into your arms. You said… well I don't remember what you said but what does it matter now? It all came crashing down around us, the walls, the roof, the sky, it fell, now the debris is burning and I am leaving. I hate to say goodbye to you, I hate to just let our love die.

But… God there is no more buts or ifs, its over. Love is gone, hope is shattered, faith is fading and us… _we_ are as lifeless as those who dwell in the ground.

**I've been searching deep down in my soul  
Words that I'm hearing are starting to get old  
It feels like I'm starting all over again  
The last three years were just pretend  
And I said,**

I can't believe… I just can't believe that we were so close, so god damn close to being perfect. One kiss, one kiss at the Bloody Hook and you and I… we were together. It was great… for a few months, four to be exact, I kept track. Want to know why? Because every second, every kiss, every hug, every time we made love was heaven… was perfect. Now, _now _I sit here in my empty house and there is nothing left of me.

Of us…

You said you loved me and I'm sure you did… I'm sure… I'm not sure you still do. I do… some days… well, I love you today. It's making saying goodbye so, _so_ much harder. I don't know if I can. I leave as soon as I let go of my foolish hopes. I'm going to get up, climb onto my zoomer and leave this city behind me, leave _you_ behind me. Yet… yet I am still being stubborn and stupid and I am sitting on my lounge room floor just waiting, _hoping_, praying, _begging_ for you to come through the door and say… say that everything is ok.

To say that you love me…

**Goodbye to you  
Goodbye to everything I thought I knew  
You were the one I loved  
The one thing that I tried to hold on to**

One month ago, one month ago to this very day you stopped telling me you loved me. You changed, became different, distant, I hardly ever saw you. When I did, you didn't even kiss me. What did I do? Did I smoother you? Did I talk too much? Did I push you to hard… did I…? God what did I do? I've always loved you! Always been there for you! I stood up for you when Veger tried to through you out. I stood before you as people taunted you about being a monster… I looked the other way when they said… when they said you'd break my heart someday.

I should have listened, shouldn't have I?

But you would say, 'I love you Keira, more then life itself' and you sealed your words with a kiss. A kiss that was alive with passion, desire and a lifetime of love, a lifetime of love? How naïve am I? Four months we lasted, three months you loved me and for one you hated me and I hated… _I hate you_.

I climb to my feet, I am shaking, tears blur my vision and I can feel the emotions choking me but I will not cry. I will leave. A few shaky steps, I'm nearly at the door, one last look at my house, we had some fun here, didn't we? I remember how we always, _always_ cooked dinner together, you love to cook. You're great at it too, but you are great everything. Especial at breaking my heart.

Tears blind me; I can still hear our laughter, see our smiling faces as we cooked meals out of love. But like the food we are gone. Only the mess left behind _can't_ be washed away with soap and hot water.

**I still get lost in your eyes  
And it seems that I can't live a day without you  
Closing my eyes and you chase my thoughts away  
To a place where I am blinded by the light  
But it's not right**

I step outside, the warm breeze brushes against my frozen skin. I look to the sky, it's so blue today, not a cloud to be seen. It's a pretty blue… not as lovely as the blue of yours eyes though.

They were always bright when you came to see me, full of love and life. I could get lost for hours in them, they are… _were_ hypnotizing. Then one day you came around and they were not bright but dull, like the sea after a storm. You know it as well as I, you eyes are like the ocean. When you are happy they are bright but when you are… not yourself they are dark.

Dark, empty… _soulless_…

I haven't seen the crystal blue in so long, I miss it… I did miss it… I do miss it. God I do… God I miss you! But I still have to go, I still have to say goodbye. I take a deep breath and I shut my door and walk, _slowly_, ever so slowly to my zoomer, which is parked and packed waiting for me on the road. I am stupid, I am _so_ stupid. I am still clinging so desperately to the hope that you will come back and you eyes will be bright blue.

I will always love you…

But I still have to go.

**And it hurts to want everything and nothing at the same time  
I want what's yours and I want what's mine  
I want you  
But I'm not giving in this time**

The wind blows my hair into my eyes, I have mounted my zoomer and I am driving… _I am leaving_. The houses, the shops, the people pass by in a mass of colour. This city is just a reminder of us, of what we had and what we lost. The walls are caving in on me, every inch of this city reminds me of you, _of us_.

You once loved to take me out… you once loved me.

You'd take me to dinner, you were always shy, just like you had always been but the nights were always so wonderfully. M_agically_. We, _us_, our love was magic. It was the greatest magic there was but the spell we were put under came undone and we were cursed and tainted.

You stopped taking me out when you stopped telling me you loved me and just like that it all fell apart. The last flames of our burning love died and you turned away and I have to say goodbye.

You were once my hero, my one true love, my shooting star, but like a shooting star you were gone… _just like I am_.

But just remember that I once loved you.

**And when the stars fall  
I will lie awake  
You're my shooting star**

**Please review and the song is Goodbye to you by Michelle Branch :)**


End file.
